sttatuesque

Sorry for not updating peeps :(
Have been experiencing some problems with livejournal recently.
Btw, I SUCK SO MUCH ;D

There is like no end to projects, why! 
I really need a good rest, like seriously x (

HOPE FOR THE BETTER (:

Both Jasper & Lessy (she always did) brighten my day :D
To jasper: Sorry to disappoint you, Mabel & I managed to finish our recording during the last 7 minutes before the next class :D HAHAHAHA
& it's of QUALITY hehh . Btw, missed your voice man! nice to hear your voice like, after so longggg (not long actually :X )




( More photos! )


The last time I went sentosa with Alfie was 9 sept (09/09) , this time round is 11 nov (11/11).
LOL. alfie, let's go on 1 jan (01/01) :DDD okaaayy!


Goodnight Readers! (:

Will only be blogging on friday.
Im dead-beat D:

really tired.

Mabel, I totally agree (:


i noticed, a lot of my friends enjoy posting things with regards to love, all over their facebook, pm, twitter, blogs etc.
and when i say love, i mean bgr kind of love. 
fair enough, i don't deny i myself, do think of being in a relationship at times. (like AWW HOW I WISH I HAVE A BOYFRIEND WHO DRIVES! THEN HE'LL BE ABLE TO SEND ME HOME!- hire a chauffeur and problem's solved. or, even easier, flag a cab.)
however, i honestly cannot understand why (bgr form of) love is occupies such a dominant part of their life or, even so,
is all that their lives revolve around. 

what is (bgr form of) love to you?
professing your love for each other on your pms, get together because you like each other, go stargazing,
hold each other's hands and sticking to each other night and day till you get sick of each other and complain that the other party's too possessive three months down the road?

telling each other "you are my everything","i will love you forever" or even better, get married because, uh, you're so comfortable hanging around each other so it should be fine sleeping next to each other?

we all dream of an arbitrary someone special, you know you know.. we all want to be smiled at, teased and affected affectionately.
and then we'll die together, in each other's arms, while gazing at the brilliant night, under the beautiful moonlit patch of grass right?
pedigrees can do that.

every boy wants to be his girl's first lover, and every girl wants to be her guy's last woman. 
then ten years down the road, we wonder why we actually married that hell of a jerk/bitch. 
simple, "love is blind". however, it is blind only because it goes way beyond roses and poems. 
it goes beyond "i miss you"s and "i love you"s published ever so often on msn pms. beyond locked fingers.
beyond even a marriage deal. 
love is patient, love is kind. love is sacrificing.
He died on the cross for me and you.
for love He died to give you life. 


anyway, i remember asking some suitors why they liked me & i got various comments.
"because you are funny" go marry a clown.
"because you are cute" hamsters are cute too.
"because you are pretty" thank you, i'm flattered. but, do you think i'll look the same fifty years down the road?
"i don't have a reason. yet, there isn't really or, can't really be a reason to why i like you right?" i liked this answer best.
and i was touched.
SURPRISEEDD?
why do your parents love you?
why do you love your parents?
why do you love your siblings?

if you were hell ugly, do you think your parents will love you all the same? sure they will.
do think your parents' love for you would have been less if you were disabled in any way?
certainly not. 

you know, when you love a person with reasons like "because you're funny", "because you're hot", "because you're muscular", will you still love him or her when he/she loses these traits?

i'm not referring to people preferring a certain type of people as their partners over the rest. i'm talking about superficial reasons people have for liking someone. 

and when i say i was touched by what the last guy said, it's because i felt his sincerity. so don't start using this as your answer when your girl asks why you like her. mean it, jerk. 

( Click for photos!  )

Today was a wonderful day, had lesson till only one & went on a date with Lessy :D
After lesson went to Funam mall to collect her Mac. 
Talked like, non-stop till we reached thr. 
& had our lunch at BK after that, we almost got couldn't find our way there :X

then mabel shared with me some songs that she and her choir compose, sang and ..AIYAH, practically, they did everything! 
it's nice though. Enjoyed it very much, esp her mum's part, I was quite surprised by her singing (:

Then we walked around till 6, and we trained home.
AND OMG. we freaking board the wrong train la
we board the train,

Mabel :  you sure this train goes to dover?
Jing: Confirm derh la. (then suddenly it occured to me that I dont remb me seeing if it's to jookoon ornot) 
Eh, did we even board the right train?
Mabel: No woman, the next stop is Bugis! 
Jing: omg! 


Just yige expected lor , whenever the both of us go out tgt, we always have such things happening to us! 
HAHAHA, but I still love her alot HOWHOW.
oh! no! I should say, I love her even more after every time we went on a dating (sounds wrong, but ya !)


Headed to Grandma house for dinner and Im back hooommmm :D

Received a call early in the morning, because tht idiot was having fever.
then woke up to only know tht my sis fell sick too, LOL?

hmm, update again tommorrow bah ! :D
Going off to accompany Fie to polyclinic and then report for my work, doubt I have the time to update today!

I LOVE JANICE AND SONIA! (:


BYE!

( photos )

Projs are stacking like I own a time bank !
Eh hello~ I dont, okkkayy -argh.

Today went for 4 hours lessons & had lunch with Lessy & Ser after a visit to SOE  :D
& I embarrased myself when I got so excited upon seeing Poon on the poster :X (she looks great ! )
calling the sapura service center was a damn funny one. 
&& Lessy said that the duck voice part will not be forgotten :D lols

headed different ways after parted at lib, & walking to bus stop is just so boring without Lessy.
Normally I'll have her to talk, crap, gossip & laugh with me- like we owned the whole world. hHHAHA
Im already missing her when I only parted from her for ,around 3.5293 minutes? D:

so anyway, I bus-ed to Sp to meet the idiot who refuses to bus down.
headed to his house cause he going to gym with kaixiang (another idiot) while I need to do my work.
Alfie was so bastard can, keep talking about the amanda & his GEMs class 
just yige depo eryi. HAHAH

ohh, so I did my work at his place,
do the voice editing do until damn pekchek uh.
the guy's chinese just yige chui eryi lor.  TSk
wanted to have meeting with Elton & Gella derh, in the end all pangseh ):
LOL @ "hello, Alfie uh?" during phone call with elton.  just yige stupid eryi :X

Fie headed down to gym to meet kaixiang while I continue with my editing.
abit scary to be alone in the bedrooom after he left, haahha.
recently I become alil timid due to some reasons, LOL.
luckily they gymed like for only ten minutes? so kaixiang came too, with their sec sch friend.
They play Xbox, then I just sian thr, cause I still dont know how to control my character :X
So I slept till Fie's mum came back home, and went home after the guys finished their last game.
freaking walked home with their friend whom Idk luhhh. cause someone just dump me with him TSk.

But okaay luh, I such a great person to talk to. HOR?
so didn't really turn out as bad as I thought HAAH.


he's quite nice, insisting on walking me home despite not knowing me yet (SEE, ALFIE! dont you feel guilty? )
LOL & im back home for projs : /

OKAAY. I've been shooting alfie quite a few times today.
my dear idiotic, bimbotic 7 years of friend, dont get angry aright !
let's continue to stay disgusting & thick skinnn & "nao" about $$ , cause I cant find a second YOU in this world :D



Goodnight readers :D !

( photos! )

"I'll be fine. will be back with my smile real soon"     -jingyi-


I survived tday.
But my heart is still in pain, no words could describe.
Today, my mum, all my aunties, my sis & I all broke down.
grandma leaves such a huge impact in all of our life, & she just left so suddenly.
tell me, who could accept this sudden cruel fact ?

Once again, I stepped into the place I hated the most today.
dragging my feets in, I saw "ong ah kiow; 2.15"  .
water filled my eyes till I couldn't see properly, nose was feeling so pain.
went into the VERY COLD rooom, and then proceed to.....the viewing hall.

stood at the first row, water just came out from my eyes like someone turned the tap to the fullest.
then when the coffin was half way thr, we all could no longer just tear, we all cried.
because, we are losing her forever.
forever..
we wont be able to receive her calls every night anymore.
mum totally broke down. & my big aunt.
being the only 2 daughters, my grandma always dote on them alot .
having only 17 years of memories is already such a huge blow to me,
I couldn't imagine how scary is it for my mum to go through this period of time.

the first night when grandma died, mummy couldn't go to sleep.
dad was working, so mum was alone in bedroom.
guess the room was too quiet, she cant get to sleep.
so I sat beside her, switch on the teevee for sounds to accompany her to sleep.
She fell asleep quite fast, but.. I saw tears rollling down from her eyes.
she must be missing her mum alot ><

My mum may be fierce to my sis and I (tht's because she loves us),
but deep down- she's always only a lil woman.
A woman who loves the hug from her husband, loves to be around her mum, loves kisses form her kids.
I cannot imagine how miserable my mum was, to accept this distressing news.

ohmy, I cant continue anymore. 

It's time for me to move on.
But I know this gonna take sometime, because I SIMPLY LOVE HER TOO MUCH.

MUM ! hang on okaay, I 'll always be thr for you & I LOVE YOU! 

____________________________________________________________________________♥

It's the second day without my grandma.
Doesn't seems real to me though. somehow felt that I'll see her later for usual saturday breakfast session.
But just the thought of not being able to hold her hands anymore, my stupid tears just cant stop!
& Today, me as an idiot, listened to slow songs on my way to school.
then I freaking cant stop the flowing luh! just yige omg. (then tht idiot alife called me,& i couldn't ans him with a normal voice)
those tiny lil bits of memories makes me miss her even more.

okkayy, i know recent post is so sucky & saddening. but im sorry. 
do bear with me for a few days & my blog will be filled with photos of my colourful life !
i promise all those out thr who's concern about me, I m strong- I'll definitely move on with life(: but pls be thr to hold me if I fall :D

Lessy, thanks for the "very-business-format" letter which makes me laugh at the start & cry at the last.
I love you. really. (even with the zi-zhar smell ;D)
For being there all the while when I need shoulders to cry on, and gave me a BIG HUG that makes me feel so much better (((:

Alfie teng! Idk should I say you sucks or not leys. You accused me for slandering you in THAT POST, && went to tell june about my THINGS (you should know what), yet you put a smile back onto my face with the stupid long random phone convo ; driving all my sorrows away. 
alright, shall just reward you with [tenth time human being award] okkayy? :D
&& dont forget you're only dating HER tmr. dont bother to call us along okaay!
yes, I posted on my blog : X

Thanks desmond for your volunteer of your ears ((:

alright, turning in !
I want a good sleep. please.

Everything just happened so suddenly, or rather, the news came so unexpectedly.
It was a blow to me. I nearly broke down. (didn't because mabel & ser was thr with me, thank god.)

She wasn't sick or feeling unwell. why! 

...... ...... (sigh)

Now, anything that reminds me of her would bring tears.
I really would do anything if I could bring her back to life, I swear.
Shorter by another 10 cm? screwed up hair back? become as fat as a pig? 
I dont mind ! as long as she's back to my side.
Im praying so hard that she'll coming knocking at my door & tell me that we made a mistake.

I was pretty fine after Lessy succeed in cheering me up, (thanks mabel! )
but my heart sunk so deeep down that I could no longer reach to pick it up after reading the newspaper.
How she died, the timings, the whole incident was so detailed until I could no longer convince myself that she went on a "holiday"

When I was primary five, grandfather left me.
I went to viewing hall, & I prayed so hard that I dont have to go thr anymore.
yet, Great-grandma still left us when I was in secondary four. so I spent 16th birthday at viewing hall crying so badly.
that year, I made a birthday wish- " I hope all my love ones will stay by me, & I dont wish to be here (viewing hall) anymore."
But it seems that my wish didn't came true. my great grand uncle passed away this year.
Now, being 17 years old, is much more harder for me to accept, seeing someone I love to be pushed in there.
It's too much for my heart to take it, I could hardly breathe whenever I was thr, I had to cry out for their name.
cause I knew that was going to be my last time, i'll never get to call them anymore.

it's so saddening.

really.

or when you're talking to them, they could no longer respond to you.
all I see was only them lying in coffin, ignoring me. 
they could no longer hug me like how they hugged me when I was young.
they could no longer praise me like what they always do.
they could no longer say how pretty Im in their eyes.

what can I do now.?

Looking through your eyes, there's nothing to hide 
And you're no longer mine 
How could I survive when you say goodbye 
Why do birds still fly up high？ 
Cant stop the tears from falling ...
( more.. )

Thanks mabel for the sweet hug & being thr to wipe my tears away.
Thanks Fie for getting the papers specially for me.
Thanks to all who gave your concerns.

Im fine, at least for now.

Today had only 2 hours of lesson, & I met up with Lessy to do our assignment in the morning (:
Cw & his friend was thr tooo.

Wanting to complete our work, we were late for lesson : /
Went to lib & co-op after schoool.
( mabel laughed at my ezlink card photo! lols )
then Bus-ed to SP to meet elton while waiting for Fie to end his LOVE RELATIONS class. lols
SP just 一个美而已。
& the food thr just 一个便宜而已。
the girls thr just 一个漂亮而已。
the guys thr just 一个帅而已。(exclude elton & alfie :X )

then Fie pon his class and we started on my tour around sp :D
& the three of us were wearing nike tee with yellow font without prior arangement !
just 一个有默契而已。[:

trained back home after that D:
If I knew I was going to go home just lidat, I should meet Lessy to see the kids instead ! AWWW.
I'LL LOVE THE KIDS ><

&& I was alil upset just now (the usual reason).
maybe I expected too much from all of them D:
Im such a bad girl !

goodnight readers! :D

Yes. Im sick of it, the thought of people who cant work just turns me off.
Yet I always keep it to myself, I can die from it.
Take work for an example, the girl did came for work.
But so? she wears the uniform, walk around like some slacker.
if her speed of collecting plate is ..60 plates per hour, mine would be 180 per hour !
yes, she did work, but cant she put in more effort ?
Slacking & giving low quality work wont get you anywhere in life, why dont you just start to become a pleasant person to work with?
that makes everyone's life easier (at least for me), no? 
Im definitely not a perfectionist, so if I expect something from you, then I guess that's the basic that everyone expect right?
TSk. 

alright, I pon lecture today : X
cause I really couldn't get up from bed. lols
went for lesson at eleven, then had lunch with gella & elton & kaijun (:
then headed for lesson at 3 after camwhored in makan place. LOL
I love today's lesson anyw, hahaha.
The group work was fun :D
esp the part when mabel, me & shimin made up a story regarding our news HAHAH.

went to meet elton to bus home together. 
But I slept all the way in bus : / too tired.

( { click here for photos! :D )

goodnight readers! :D

Let me update today before I go on explaining the reason for my title of this post (:

So I trained my way down to cityhall to meet han and then walk to flyer thr together with jordon and his gfriend,celest
We made friends and then met del to report @ the destination.
so the guys danced, flared and whatever they could do, while me & celest had girls' talk :D

sy, gil, marcus, cw and poon they all joined shortly.
got the black tee, bused to the aid point 1 to get everything ready.
it was fun overall luh. HAHHA.
all the volleyballers are crazy and jordon was curious about the "just" that we all adds in all our sentence.
"just yige cui eryi" LOL

Yup! then headed to marina square for lunch with poon,jocelyn,cw,billy, sy,marcus,del and gil.
headed home for sleeeeeeep after that.


&& yup, something happended on bus.
I smacked han unintentionally ):
I was too tired and happended that so many of them were disturbing me, so my brain failed to work normally.
& my idiot hand went to give han a smack on his face when he blowed my ear. OMMMMGGGGGGG.
Im terribly terribly terribly sorrryyy! ><
I felt so worried & guilty until I almost died on train on my way home, seriously.
luckily he didn't put it into mind. he put a smile back to my face with the message :D

I am seriously an idiot for smacking my own very good friend TSk.
so much so for a person who brought jersey for me to wear when I dont have it, lend laptop case when I lost mine,
still meet 004 for lunch everyday despite having so many BA friends, encourage me & support when I need it,
impart me new knowledges about things that I never knew, lead me when I couldn't find my way  (like today)
and he's always ready to put all his things aside when I need him.

still remb once when I was so troubled and so I msg-ed him.
despite having papers the very next day and he wasn't quite done with his revision, he still lent me his ears.
& when I told him to talk next time ask him to study first, he replied me: "it's okay, you more impt" 
omg. how can I still......!
I regretted  D:

was thinking about all these when I was on train, tht's why it came out as a whole paragraph. lol

anyw, have work to do. 

photos are up on facebook, [Np life 7]
will upload here when I have enough sleep. (:


byee readers! 

These few mornings, I've been reflecting when Im on bus . (exclude times when I fell asleep on stranger's shoulder :X)
I want to be clear of what I want to achieve at the end of this semester, & at the same time change my work attitude.
I dont want 2.667 for my GPA again, I REALLY DONT WANT.
& hence, after looongg consideration, I gave up my dear volleyball.
oh man, My life is so goonna suck. ):

Yes, everyone- tht's the reason why you guys haven't been seeing me going for trainings HAIS.
as much as I dont want to, but obviously results has alr shown that I cant cope studies together with volleyball well huh?

):

(thinking, thinking, thinking )
 
okay, I give up.
I cant put my thoughts into words. 
HAHAHA

&&&& ohmy, I miss Jo. 
omg. 
JO, I know you'll read this.
Please know that I love you ookkaay!
Do find me if you need tissues, ears or shoulders. free of charge for you :D
& PLEASE ATTEND CLASSSS UH, DONT BE LATE CAN ! : /
though we're no longer in same class, you're NOT going to leave my heart no matter what (:


Yup. lazy to update my day today. 
It sucks.
except when mabel, jiayu & I actually laughed at something that we dont like, hahaha.
& "It's Mabel-lim" is so funny. 
I Love Lessy toooo. see you tmr for movie :DD

till here
Goodnights Reader! C:

Lessy :D